It has been several days of NOT good things. There are, however, still things to celebrate.
Let me explain.
I don’t want to seem like Pollyanna. She was very popular for a time and there’s some good stuff in that book; honestly, there is. But there is a limit to cheery positivity in the face of rough times, bad news, and overall crisis. Cross that line and most people will look at you as if you’re completely unhinged.
That being said, bad times pass. That’s a Very Good Thing, as bad things tend to come in very unwelcome groups. (Willy Shakes said it well in Hamlet when he wrote that “When sorrows come, they come not single spies, but as battalions.” Say what you will about that son of a glove-maker, but he did have a turn of phrase.)
So – let’s take a look at this. In the span of a very few days, I had an unpleasant medical test, we had to say good-bye to a beloved pet, I had unexpected car trouble, my visit with Dad was hard, and my phone up and died on me. In modern terms, that’s a lot to deal with all at once.
Give it time, Divas. Give it time.
The test – my yearly mammogram – is certainly unpleasant at best and painful at worst. But I’ve come through multiple biopsies, a diagnosis of early-stage cancer, surgery, seven weeks of five-times-a-week radiation, and five years of post-surgical medication treatment. And my case was the best possible diagnosis, which would not have been possible without my yearly mammogram. 80% of diagnoses are in patients with no history of the disease. For me, I endure five minutes of intense discomfort in exchange for years of cancer-free living. Make the appointment. Take a friend and make a party out of it. Go into the room wearing an aqua feather boa and a sparkly tiara if that floats your boat. Go out for mimosas afterward. Just keep the appointment.
Our beloved calico had graced our home for more than 12 years. We gave her a good life and she was an excellent cat. If you take an animal into your home and heart, you have agreed to be there until the bitter end. Yes, it’s sad and we’re grieving having one fewer food dish to put out. But we were good cat-parents and she knew she was safe and loved even at the very end which was without pain.
Cars are going to need maintenance. Regular tune-ups (just like that mammogram!) can keep small problems from becoming show-stoppers. Knowing that, we juggled our budget so we didn’t have to use a credit card and we tightened our belts for the next few weeks. (I remain available for coffee and lunch/dinner dates, provided I can pay with sparkling conversation.)
My visit with Dad – well. That was hard. My father is a great guy and it is frustrating to see this decline. But I know him and I’ll continue to tell stories about him, because everyone should be so lucky as to know about that rip-roaring “190 pounds of hell and romance” who raised me.
Lastly, technology is designed to not last. I dislike the concept of planned obsolescence, but it’s built into many contemporary products. Buy the insurance, brew a cup of tea, and call the Customer Service number. (It goes without saying [right??] that no rhinestones will be added to your tiara for venting on the poor rep working your call. Holding your temper is why you brewed the tea.) I’ll admit that I’ve been twitchy the last few days, but the new phone is charging up in the kitchen and I’ll get things (mostly) sorted out tonight.
All of this it to say that it’s okay to feel sad and overwhelmed sometimes. There’s no need to even pretend to be happy all the time. But don’t mistake the Blues (which we all sing as part of the human condition) for Despair (if you’re spending too much time with that member of the Endless, please love yourself enough to seek help).
It’ll be okay.
And knowing that is a Good Thing.
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